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NOº 1283

Misfit Pilgrimage (PDX): A Foodcart Is Born


THE THING ABOUT FOODCARTS IN PORTLAND, OREGON

I mean. I don’t know what the thing about foodcarts is, generally speaking. A foodcart is a foodcart is a foodcart, right? But it turns out not really.

If you’re in Portland, Oregon, some foodcarts are vegan. Actually: most foodcarts are vegan (or at least vegan-friendly).

At some foodcarts you can get “insane tater tot bowls.”

If you’re in Portland, Oregon, there’s a grilled-cheese food cart. More than one, actually. And they’re not like any other grilled-cheeses you’ve ever put in your mouth. They are, like, divine grilled-cheeses.

So yes. Generally speaking, if you’re in Portland, Oregon, there’s pretty much a whole foodcart hierarchy and there are some really talented people making food in foodcarts and, thus/therefore, you can get some bitchin’ (Ha! I said ‘bitchin’’! In a blog!) grub in/from a foodcart in Portland, Oregon. That’s just how it is. And plus! you can get your exceedingly tasty/healthy food from a foodcart in Portland, Oregon, for way under $10 a pop.

A NOTE REGARDING ENTREPRENEURSHIP (IN PORTLAND, OREGON)

So here is the joke: “Portland, Oregon, is the town where young people go to retire!” Ha! Ba-dum-cha! I’m here all week. But serious. That’s not a joke I made up. It’s a joke everybody knows in Portland, Oregon — or else if you’re from Portland, Oregon, and you haven’t heard that joke before, you know exactly why it’s (supposably) funny.

REASON #1 IT’S SUPPOSABLY FUNNY

There’s never any jobs in Portland, Oregon.

REASON #2 IT’S SUPPOSABLY FUNNY

“Creative” types are drawn to Portland, Oregon, like rail-thin buzzards to a dead armadillo on the side of a rural highway. Job? We don’t need no stinkin’ job!

Hence: there’s a proverbial shitload of homeless folks in The PDX.

It’s like. They’re a constituency or something.

I’m not mad at homeless people in Portland or anything.

I’m just sayin’. That’s what I saw.

[And yes: I’m aware that schizophrenia and/or addiction aren’t (necessarily) the same thing as creativity. Also! I have nothing against schizophrenics, addicts, homeless people, and/or creative types. I’m pretty sure I’m somewhere in their tribe. Or else I’m way more in their tribe than in, say, Eric Cantor’s or something. So. Yes. Thank you. Amen.]

BUT!

Also — while, yes: there’s not a million jobs — it does seem there’s this can-do, Hey! I’ll-just-like-maybe-sell-you-something! ethos in the Greater Portland Metro Area.

ENTER: FOODCARTS.

And it would be one thing if these foodcarts were trying to sell you a shit-sandwich or something. And the proverbial/literal bag-o-chips. But they’re not. It’s. Like. Really Good Food.

(Which likely means that all the homeless folks in Portland, Oregon, aren’t schizophrenics or addicts at all. They just have foodcarts, and they’re homeless because they’re not charging enough for the divine sammies they sell.)

So. That’s a roundabout way to get around to these fellas at 100milespdx.tumblr.com.

Not only do these boys make the stellar sammies. But! Let the record show: I ate the VERY FIRST EVER stellar sammy these boys sold! Ever!

WHICH MAKES ME VERY PROUD FOR TWO (2) REASONS

The First Reason It Makes Me Proud I Bought the First Sandwich The Fellas at 100milespdx.tumblr.com Ever Sold:

  • It was a damn good sandwich. Beets. Tillamook cheddar. Purple garlic. Carmelized onion. Oregon whole grain bread. Jay-is. Now that was good.

The Second Reason It Makes Me Proud I Bought the First Sandwich The Fellas at 100milespdx.tumblr.com Ever Sold:

  • They mean it. That sandwich was important to them. Sometimes I’ve made a poem and it wasn’t all that important to me. And sometimes I’ve made a poem and it was the most important thing in the world to me. It was a fundamental expression of who I was/am. That latter is how this sandwich was. The beet sandwich I ate at 100milespdx.tumblr.com was a heartfelt this-is-who-I-am poem/sandwich. Yes.

And where else in the world can you get such a thing?

HERE’S WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT THEMSELVES

100milesPDX. One Hundred Miles. Portland, OR. This is what happens when a business, a food cart, decides to get 99% of its foods from local farmers. What happens when you break the mindset of “needing” everything, at all times. Certain household staples, such as tea, coffee, rice, and sugar travel halfway across the world to make it way to your table. so we ask why? Why go through such a painstaking, environmentally taxing process, when we don’t have to. Everything we need is in our own back yards.

HERE’S WHERE THEY ARE IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE

http://100milespdx.tumblr.com/

So. Yes. Wherever you are. Go find them. They’re easy enough to find: 2421 NE Alberta. Rip City. USA.

Which means that if you don’t find them, it’s your fault.

Also. If you want to find the full “interview” you can click here. But it’s much better if you just go find them and ask them to make you a sandwich. I promise.